Where is My Cherry?

I’ll only do this with the lights off...
I've never done this before. You see, I am trapped in a maddening purgatory, floating somewhere between the obstinant curmudgeon uninterested in anything more high-tech than a microwave and the modern woman who knows that advances in technology make life more convenient and are necessary in order to survive in any personal or professional setting. Not that I ever really want to survive in a professional setting, but it may be unavoidable someday. I still carry a cell phone that only makes phone calls-no camera, no downloads, no internet access, only 3 strange melodic choices of ringtone, etc... And until recently I deemed MySpace and FaceBook ridiculous and loathsome outlets of self-promotion, and I am still not even entirely sure how to replace songs on my iPod. On the other hand, I have recently begun the process of "pimping" my MySpace page rather than letting it fester unvisited in default display, I signed up for FaceBook (it was only to see Bachman’s Halloween pictures, but still...) and I have now decided to make a cautious foray, eyes closed and hands outstretched and hesitant, into what the kids today are calling blogging. I still have trouble saying it...because really how fucking self-important is it to assume that anyone gives a shit about what you have to say and that, furthermore, it should be posted in a public venue? Pretty self-important, I think, but since I am a self-obsessed attention whore anyway I guess that self-important isn’t too far out of the ball-park. At least self-importance conveys a positive sense of self-esteem, whereas self-obsession leads to self-destruction in my case. The problem is, what does one blog about? Are the mundane details of my everyday life expected to hold other MySpacers rapt in attention and anticipation for the next word? Or am I supposed to embellish the details so as to appear more interesting, as seems to be the protocol with the rest of MySpace and networking sites in general? I pick the latter, I guess, because if everyone else is subtly upping themselves I am going to look like a loser if I shoot straight. I suppose that, as we all do our first time, I will fumble around in the dark at first, grabbing the wrong thing here and there, feeling like I’m doing it just because everyone else does. Then I’ll get the hang of it and work the blog with finesse.Eventually, I will become a master of the ways of the blog, know just where to touch it to make it scream. Oh God! I’m finished. So there it is... I’ve done it and I can’t take it back. Was it as good for you as it was for me?